A long road ahead of us...

Well, I'm really not sure when or if we will ever be able to have a child. I haven't wrote in awhile and mostly it is because I've been super depressed and I just don't feel like doing much of anything. I really need to see about going to a shrink and talking this out. I can't stand to feel so depressed all the time. Anyway... our first month on Clomid was a bust. I didn't ovulate like I had hoped. The next cycle my doctor increased my dose of Clomid and we tried again... still no ovulation. SO our third cycle will be another increased dose of Clomid and I suppose we will see how that goes. He want's me to do a CD3 blood tests, and Mark has to go in for a semen analysis. We will see how that goes. It's hard to be excited anymore because I feel like this is getting no where and I'm really starting to question if I will ever be a mother or not. I hope that soon enough it will be my turn. It's also very hard right now because my brother is expecting. I don't want my family to be excited about it, I know that's selfish but I want that to be ME. We don't talk or get along so that makes it even more hard. But we will see... hopefully something happens soon!

So tired!

Well, I finally ended up getting my period and started Clomid CD3-7! I am on CD10 right now and hoping that I ovulate soon! I feel really tired lately and I'm not sure if it is from the Clomid or what! Otherwise I was really lucky and didn't get any side effects at all! I did take 100MG for Tylenol each night when I took the Clomid so that may have helped, I'm not sure. I've been doing my ovulation prediction kit sense CD7 and today it was quite a bit darker! I'm so excited, I hope that I ovulate soon! I really am getting tired and drained from all of this. I can't wait for our journey to end! Infertility SUCKS!

Here are my tests from CD8-10. As you can see CD10 is quite a bit darker! Hopefully I get a positive test soon!

Welp,

So, I finally went to my OB/GYN. I was TIRED of waiting for my period to come. He prescribed me Provera to induce my period so hopefully it starts soon, and I will be able to start the Clomid! I am excited, but so scared at the same time.
The unfortunate news about this appointment, was we went over my blood work and other tests, and my Dr. diagnosed me with PCOS. This is so worrisome because this just means my struggles have only began. I hope and pray that it goes by fast. I need to make some major changes in my life and how I live it, but hopefully it helps us out and our journey with infertility comes to a close soon. My period should be starting within the next week (hopefully) and then I get to start my Clomid, and get to do my daily testing and all the fun stuff that comes with it. I'm SOOO excited, keeping my fingers crossed. <3

Blah Blah Blah

I haven't updated recently basically because of the fact that I STILL haven't gotten my period to start Clomid... I am getting so frustrated waiting. My last period was at the end of March, right before I had my HSG test and STILL nothing sense. Come on! I started wondering if maybe for some insane reason I got pregnant on my own, I've done 2 pregnancy test and both negative, so that is out of the question. NOW if only it would hurry up and get here. I want to start this cycle of Clomid and see what happens...

So with that being said, I haven't wrote recently due to the fact that there just isn't anything new going on with our process, it's just a waiting game as of now...

I can't wait !

I have a killer cold and just can't think, so this will be brief.

I had an appointment with my Ob/Gyn today. I am starting Clomid my next cycle ! I am SOOO excited. I really hope this is the answer I have been looking for. I am so tired of trying and SO ready for our Journey with infertility to end ! Again, I have a cold from hell so that is all I have to say for now. I will write more once I finally start my Clomid. I am due for my cycle to start at any time, but I am so irregular who really does know when it will decide to come along. 

Wow... Really?

So, I was going to try and give boards another chance... until I fell across THIS.
Really ? Come on... they were all SO mad about me "trash talking" and my supposed  "trash talking" was no where NEAR this. THIS REALLY IS TRASH TALKING. I can't believe how vicious women can be. Especially most that are old enough to be my mother. I know infertility can make you a major B-word... but I in no way deserved to be put down this badly... Whatever. Screw em.

I guess the last few weeks are just out for me.
First me and Marks friends wife go at it.
Then when this originally started.
Then Mark and I's sister go at it.
And now more of this.

I just can't win. GO AWAY DRAMA !

Huge relief !

Let me tell ya... what a relief ! I had my HSG test done on April 1st. I had spotting, and then heavy bleeding and cramping all the way up until yesterday ! And it FINALLY stopped ! I am so happy, I was worried sick. I NEVER want to do that test again ! It was awful, and sooo painful. I just couldn't be happier that its all done and I can move on ! =)